The people really are the best part.
I am not a "church planter." I've decided I don't know what people mean when they use that term, but they seem to be describing someone with a very special set of gifts and abilities. That's how I know I'm not one. I'm doing what I've always done - trying to present God's Word in all its depth and power. So far, God seems to be blessing our efforts.
And the key word in that last sentence (besides the word "God") is the first person plural pronoun. I am totally convinced that if there is a critical variable in starting a church it is not the personality and skill set of the pastor. It's the people! And I can't imagine a better group with which to begin a new ministry than this one. To an individual.
T'ank you, Fadder.
This video has no sound, so don't bother turning up the volume. And it's a pretty basic trick. But you can use it to dazzle your mother-in-law.
Balanced Glass
And look for this to show up in Belichick's playbook soon:
Crazy Football
In the chariot race scene from Ben Hur, Charlton Heston is wearing a wrist watch.
Alright folks, if I can have your attention please! I hope you've enjoyed your pizza. If you didn't you have only yourself to blame, since you brought it. Pam baked some brownies, (cheers erupt) so as soon as we're done with this portion of our convention we'll dig into some dessert. But right now I have two announcements.
First, I'd like to introduce my running mate, the next Vice President of the United States...Polly Purebred! While this choice may surprise the mainstream press I think she's the ideal person, uhm, character for this position. She bears a striking resemblance to a certain candidates wife. She herself has served in the press, and her objectivity is beyond question. And if any serious crisis arises during my service as President she can summon the greatest protector of them all: Underdog!
I know that some will accuse me of choosing Polly only because she'll help get me the Boomer vote and the anime vote, but that would be unfair. Animes can't vote.
And she is sweet.
I'd also like to outline another key component of my platform, our support for Israel.
Isreal warrants the full support and backing of the United States. They are and always have been a faithful ally of ours in a region with a delicate balance of power. They are a constitutional democracy. And I believe it is critical that we maintain the closest of working relationships.
However, we have for too long given an extremely disproportionate amount of financial aid to Israel.
As I've pointed out before, with the exception of Egypt (a nation we reward for their assistance in maintaining peace in the Middle East) and Columbia (a nation we give special assistance to in the fight against drugs) we give more monetary aid to Israel than we do to all the nations of Africa, Central and South America combined. In our new world we simply cannot afford to essentially ignore those nations. The U.S. is seen as insensitive to the needs of these countries struggling to emerge from poverty, and with that imbalance in foreign aid it looks like a pretty accurate view. Not surprisingly, many of these countries look to and build relationships with countries who have less than noble interests and are willing to promote those interests with massive financial aid. China is particularly active in central Africa, funding all manner of infrastructure development.
Isreal does not need the billions of dollars we give them every year. They are a first world country with an economy at least as vibrant as ours. They are a nuclear power (shhh; don't tell anyone because it's a secret) and have a powerful army, arguably disproportionate to their needs. Our continued funneling of massive amounts of financial aid to Israel without regard to any factors we use to measure aid to other countries gives credibility to those in the Middle East who seek to recruit terrorists to fight against the "great Satan." Many of those recruits come from poverty stricken villages without basic services, living within a few miles of the wealth that is Israel.
When I'm elected President I will issue an executive order ending all financial aid to Israel. We will continue to work closely with them, assuring that their security as a nation is unchallenged. But it is poor stewardship of our limited foreign aid budget to continue this imbalance in distribution.
In addition to that Executive Order, I will, within my first 100 days:
- Prohibit all women from answering questions with questions
- Order American car manufacturers to build and sell cars with manual transmissions
- Exempt 57-year old motorcycle riders with bikes formerly used by the CHP from speed limits on rural roads.
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